Humorous take on a deadly serious topic.
"Here lies Peter Professional’s career. A victim of the current recession, Peter’s career has been on life support since a layoff from a healthcare consulting firm. Prior to its final demise, Peter took his career through a stint as a personal fitness trainer and ended it working as a car salesman with a luxury-car dealership." - Does Your Resume Read Like an Obituary of Your Career? | CAREEREALISM
So how do you fix this? By making sure your resume isn't a biography of your life, but instead a targeted advertisement about what you can do. This of your resume like a movie plot. Your potential employer has a problem/conflict. He needs more sales. You are the hero. Tell him how you can get him more sales. Then present the resolution. Only include info in your resume that shows your selling capability.